Tuesday, 21 April 2015

The High Horse?

Hi Guys,
This is my first time blogging so please go easy on me! Ill start of by telling you all just a little bit about myself. I am a 27 year old mother of two and wife to the love of my life. I love social media (as most of us do) and interacting with other moms! My son is 5 and my daughter is 8months. For the past couple of months family and friends have encouraged me to blog, share my experiences and interact with moms the same as me from all over the world. So here I am.
My first blog I feel should be something that is close to my heart at moment (quiet literally!) and something that I do, read about, research and talk about every single day. And that is breastfeeding!
As you get to know me I am sure I will speak more and more about breastfeeding but for now I would like to talk about a topic I have thought about for the past couple of months.

Throughout my breastfeeding journey I have learnt so many things. From scientific facts to personal opinions. And believe me I have heard plenty of those!
Before I breastfed I thought and now believe there is a huge stigma (especially in Ireland) with breastfeeding! Breast feeders are automatically categorised as these eco warrior women that live in the woods in a tent and make there own nappies. Crazy women that have no time for themselves and were deprived of attention as a child so breastfeed theirs as a way of mending that. Women who breastfeed over a certain age are doing it for their own selfish reasons. Unbelievable, untrue, highly ironic and hurtful things and I hear them all most days. Not to me personally most days but other breastfeeding women I talk to or read in the groups I am a member of. Believe me I have heard it all. I met a woman in the supermarket and happen to mention I was ebf and her words were "oh you are one of those mental ones"
Breast feeders are branded "martyrs", women who think they are better than those who do not breast feed. Every breastfeeding mothers is automatically assumed to be sitting on a high horse waving their finger at a formula feeder.
From my experience I can honestly say I feel it is in fact totally the other way around! It is always the breast feeder that get all the stick, all the insults and all the stigma.
I have never ever heard a breast feeder say to a mother that is formula feeding anything negative about the way they chose to feed their child. It is always the breast feeders from my experience that get all the stick. Dare we mention scientifically breastfeeding is the best form of nutrition for a baby we are bombarded with insults, labels and stigma, 99% of the time from formula feeders!!! I have seen countless amounts of thrashing on social media and it is always the breast feeders that get all the hurtful comments.
I have heard it all.. When will I get my life back, how I'm too close to my baby (is that even possible??) how I could have PND because we co sleep and we don't give her a bottle, how bad it is that I never get a break and that my baby will become too attached,How a baby can be "too attached" to their mother is also beyond me?!or how I shouldn't let breastfeeding take over my life. Or the famous are you STILL breastfeeding as if it some sort of craze that women who have lost their minds do for a short period of time,that they will grow out of when they are finished "playing the martyr".
And believe me nothing good ever comes from a sentence starting with "I know breastfeeding is great and all that...."
But never once have I ever myself nor saw another breast feeding momma say a negative word to a mother that formula feeds. Nothing. I have never seen a mother with a picture of her baby on social media with a bottle in their mouth get comment after comment of abuse for it from any breast feeders. Yet I have heard and seen myself many baby nursing pictures get removed from facebook after a bombarding of negative comments.
So for me its so ironic, I think is the formula feeders doing the most finger wagging!